Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Top 5 Most Anticlimactic Movie Deaths

An anticlimax can be a decline viewed in disappointing contrast with a previous rise, or something trivial or commonplace concluding a series of significant events.  I consider both definitions in compiling this list of the most anticlimactic movie deaths.  Click the names for videos of the death scenes.

5: Vincent Vega, Pulp Fiction - We learn that Vincent Vega is a thug working for Marsellus Wallace, and he's cool in the mid-90's nobody-acts-like-this-or-talks-like-this-or-dresses-like-this way that became the norm by the end of the decade.  The thing is, he was one of the first to be like this and cross over into true pop culture.  After a number of nonchalant murders he is killed by his own gun while he's walking out of a bathroom.  Lesson: always bring your gun into the shitter, or Bruce Willis will shoot you.

4: Darth Maul, Star Wars Episode I: the Phantom Menace - This guy looks like he's going to be the baddest Jedi killer of them all, but after only 10 or so minutes of screen time, he's cut in half and falls into an air shaft or some other such nonsense.  You spent most of the crappy movie waiting for him to play a bigger role, then when he gets his moment, you get a few minutes of fighting and a lasting memory of Maul in two pieces screaming as he falls into oblivion.

3: Russell Franklin, Deep Blue Sea - Samuel L. Jackson is trapped in an underwater research base and is being hunted by intelligent sharks.  Right in the middle of one of his classic Sam Jackson monologues, a shark jumps out of the water and eats him.

2: Hoban "Wash" Washburn, Serenity - The pilot of the ship Serenity, Wash lasted through the entire series (Firefly) and most of the follow-up movie. He gets impaled by a spike fired by the enemy that flies through the window of Serenity.  It's out of the blue, senseless, unexpected, and meaningless.  Nothing is gained through his death, which works really well for the movie.  The other characters react, but only briefly--there's a job to be done (namely, staying alive) and there's no time for mourning.

1: Boba Fett, Return of the Jedi - Boba Fett is one of the coolest characters in the Star Wars franchise.  A bounty hunter by trade, Fett plays a bit role, but his dope-ass costume (featuring weathered body armor, various weapons, and a jet pack) and bad-ass personality make him feared in the Star Wars universe and beloved by generations of young nerds (author included).  His anticlimactic death came when he was inadvertantly bumped into, causing his jet pack to operate and fly him into the side of a ship, after which he fell to his death into the jaws of Sarlacc, a creature that is basically a hole in the sand with teeth.

Anything we missed?  Let us know what you think were the most anti-climactic movie deaths, but seriously--don't argue that number 1 isn't Boba Fett.  You can't top that.  And of course, like us on Facebook (we're 1 away from triple digits!) and if you liked this, share it with your friends.

8 comments:

  1. just watched serenity. alan tudyk died the first time i watched that franchise. wtf!!!

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  2. You know what's great about this Top 5?  I have never seen Pulp Fiction, I've never wanted to see Pulp Fiction and now I don't have to see Pulp Fiction.
    (I wonder how many guys Travolta groped in the bathroom before he gets shot.)

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  3. Remember the movie "Executive Decision"?  Steven Seagal was big at that time and the trailers totally sold him as a major player in the movie.  25% of the way into the movie he's sucked out of the plane when they're attached to the 747 to take out the terrorists.  He never even touched a gun.  I was like "really?".  That's when the downspiral of his career began: When he became a Yeoman Johnson from Star Trek.  Captain Kirk: "Away team...Bones, Spock, and Yeoman Johnson...come with me".  Who do you think is not coming back from that trip? 

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  4. Watch the series--better than the movie.

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  5. lol!  It's really a good movie though.

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  6. I don't remember that one!  Sounds... terrible!

    Yeah, sucks to be a redshirt in Star Trek...

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  7. Boba Fett didn't die in the Sarlaac Pit.  Read "The Mandalorian Armor."

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  8. No, I know--the Sarlaac Pit takes a thousand years to digest its food; Fett escapes or whatever.  But, limited to the movie and not the Star Wars canon, he dies.  Maybe it's more appropriate to say he "appears to die."

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