Friday, December 23, 2011

Top 5 Starfleet Captains

Okay nerds, this one's for you.  There are 5 Star Trek t.v. series, so picking the 5 best Captains be a matter of putting the Captains from each series in the proper order, right?  But I'm a firm believer that Janeway sucks, and Tryla Scott (youngest Starfleet officer to make Captain) and Rachel Garrett are much cooler.  I also believe that none of these three should crack this top 5 best list:

5: Mackenzie Calhoun - Calhoun is Captain of the USS Excalibur, and the main character in a series of Star Trek novels and comic books.  His command style is similar to that of Captain Kirk, though he's believed to be a more efficient killer, which makes him sorta scary and potentially a sociopath.  Anyway, the coolest thing about him is that he is the only Star Trek character to never appear in any series or in any movie, yet still have an action figure [nerdgasm].

4: Hikaru Sulu - Sulu was cool on the original Star Trek, but as Captain of the USS Excelsior in Star Trek VI: the Undiscovered Country, he attempts to rescue Kirk and Doctor McCoy, and eventually prevents an assassination attempt on the President of the Federation.

3: Christopher Pike - He was Captain of the USS Enterprise before Kirk, he has shuttlecrafts named after him, and even a city named in his honor (Pike City on Cestus III).  As a testament to his bravery (one example of which was his saving of multiple lives while exposing himself to dangerous rays which left him disfigured and crippled), Pike has the Medal of Valor named after him.

2: James T. Kirk - The first Captain we all knew, played by an actor who couldn't deliver lines and was somewhere between disliked and hated by his cast-mates, Kirk is the biggest icon in Star Trek (along with Spock, who though he served as Captain, never did anything worthy of being in the top 5).  Kirk, as Captain of the USS Enterprise, would be #1 if not for a guy with a French name, an English accent, and an iconic bald head...

1: Jean Luc Picard - The best Captain in the history of the Star Trek universe.  Picard was measured and level-headed, taking suggestions from his fellow officers and friends, but always making his decision after weighing the evidence he gathered.  Plus, he deserves props for putting up with Riker all those years!  My son would have been named Jean-Luc, if my wife allowed it.  Luckily for my son, my wife did not allow it.

Ugh, such a nerd.  Share with other nerds via Facebook, and feel free to comment below.  Oh yeah, random observation--why do all the good Starship names start with an "E"?  


  1. I am a bit ashamed to say, but I had a HUGE crush on Capt. Kirk when I was a kid.  He was weirdly sexy, and even the fact that he couldn't deliver any lines properly did not stop me from fantasizing about him.  Ewwww, right?  Hahahaha.  But I think that I stopped having a crush on him when he made love to that green alien Orion woman.   But I agree -- Capt. Jean Luc Picard was badass.  I loved the way he used to say "Engage!"  

  2. How about a top 5 captains of all times? I am sure Captain Barbosa and Captain Haddock would make that list

  3. I sorta have a crush on Picard, and I'm a married, straight man!

  4. Tin-Tin and Pirates of the Caribbean, right?  If it was all time, I'd probably have to include Captain Ahab, right?  You know Arnab, it's not a bad idea.  If you would want to write the top 5 as a guest author, I'd be happy to run it under your name and link it to your blog.

  5. I know I'm sure to be in the minority here, but I'm a SISKO & ARCHER guy.
    Sisko beat the Cardies, the Klingons, and the Dominion, and he'd have toasted the Borg aswell had he had some free time.
    Archer did so much with so little, and trail-blazed space exploration.

  6. I'm re-watching Enterprise, and I am gaining a whole new respect for Archer.  I could bump Calhoun...  Still not high on Sisko.

  7. Forgot Sisko and Jellico; lose credibility.

  8. JustforthiscommentMarch 20, 2013 at 9:48 PM

    lol awesome

  9. Didn't forget; they just didn't make the cut. Though having re-watched DS9, I have a new respect for Sisko.

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