Everyone knows the government has secrets the rest of us
can’t ever know, but some people go a little further in their distrust of the
government. There are a large number of people
who think the establishment is controlled by all sorts of nefarious leaders
(and creatures). They obviously have
more faith in the government than I do because I’m pretty sure our leaders are
not nearly as cool or capable as these conspiracy theories assume. If they were, I’d trust them a whole lot more
myself. Here are the 5 stupidest of these beliefs.
5 - Fluoride. That fluoride in your drinking water? Well it’s not to
make your teeth all nice and pretty for your lover. It’s really the government’s way to enslave
the population. There is a conspiracy theory that Flouride in the public
water systems is used as mind control, or population control, or to make us all
slaves to the man. Some believe it makes citizens more likely to be subjugated,
develop schizophrenia, or to become ill.
Read more about it here.
4 - Government mind-control. Not only are they poisoning our
water, but a lot of people believe the government controls our minds through subliminal
messages in the TV. I’m almost certain this is not true because I’ve tried
using subliminal messages to get better at life and they don't work; I totally
wasted my $1.99 on iTunes! This
conspiracy theory also assumes the government is a lot cooler than it actually
is and that the population is a lot harder to control than it actually is. In reality, you can pretty much convince the
masses to believe anything without subliminal messages or poisoned water. Read
more about it here.
3 - Aliens and nukes. The government’s nuclear weapons sites are being visited
by UFOs. These UFOs are disarming the weapons by causing the systems to be lose
contact with control and the UFOs also cut the power to the weapons. I can’t
really explain this better than the UK Daily Mail can, so read more of this nonsense here.
2 - New World Order. There is a New World Order of super elite people operating
as a shadow government who are the evil masterminds behind every world war and major event, and who control the media and the entertainment industries. Lady
Gaga is their minion. They also caused the recession because they control the
economy. They hang out at places like “Bohemian Grove” in California and
participate in orgies and occult rituals, then they go something called the
Bildeberg Hotel in the Netherlands where they plot more ways to take over the
world. They are also behind the
aforementioned water fluoridation so they can more easily take over the world… Subject yourself to more craziness here.
1 - Reptoids. Believe it or not, there are a lot of people who actually
think the following is true. There is a secret race of reptiles controlling the
world. Yep, that’s right. People actually believe some lizards
came down from space eons ago and now control the human population. They also shape-shift. That New World Order I
just told you about? Obviously they’re all lizard people. You think that nice man in the Oval Office is
a human? Nope, at night he shape-shifts into a lizard. You think Prince William
and Kate Middleton are sweet newlywed couple? You’re wrong, they are Lizards. Check it out here and here.
In the interest of full-disclosure though, here is a
Cracked.com list of seven conspiracy
theories that actually did turn out to be true, so you never know...
Share your favorite consipiracy theory (or defend the "thruth" of one of these) below, and don't forget to share with your friends on Facebook and Twitter, and visit Eileene's blog: Happiness is Excellence.
To be fair, that $1.99 on iTunes just subliminally made you more likely to buy stuff on iTunes. Better check your credit card statement.
ReplyDeleteThere was a great documentary on the Reptoids called, "They Live." Rowdy Roddy Piper tells it like it is. True story.
ReplyDelete- Jim in LA
They Live is one of my favorite movies of all time, and my wife will back me up--I forced her to sit through (some of) it.
ReplyDeleteLongest fist fight ever.
ReplyDeleteHow about vaccines giving your kid Autism?
ReplyDeleteTo me, that's in a different category. It isn't stupid, it's dangerous... But either way, a guest blogger wrote the post, not I, so...
ReplyDeleteChecked our flouride levels in our water and it is disgustingly high. Flouride in the water is real and flouride is a poison. Flouride does have those effects on man. It does not take all gov officials to be nefarious it only takes one policy, one regulation, one habit, one tradition, or one testament from one person to be considered conventional belief. If you are not worried about the amount of flouride you ingest you are beyond help and have already drank such an amount to display the intended effects.
ReplyDelete