Monday, March 19, 2012

Top 5 Ways Nighttime TV Could Improve

I watch tv before bed, and I have for as long as I can remember.  However, it isn't without its problems.  Here are the top 5 fixes to make bedtime tv a better experience.

5: Don't play really good shows.  If something that's too good is on, it makes me want to watch instead of sleep, which means I'll have a shitty next day.
Perfectly acceptable evening television programming.

4: Don't intersperse crappy shows in a block of good ones. I'll put on Three's Company to fall asleep, but if I'm not out by the end and Full House comes on, I need to get the remote and find something else to watch, waking up and starting the whole sleep process over.
As if we needed more reasons to hate this show.

3: Sleep timers should somehow figure our when I've been asleep for 10 minutes then shut off the tv. It's bad when canned laughter from Benson wakes you up at 4 a.m.  It's worse when you are on the verge of sleep but wake up because the sleep timer shuts everything off too early.  Get on this, engineers.
Benson!

2: Don't Test the emergency broadcast system at night. I can't believe I have to point this out, but it only pisses people off when they wake up from the super-loud *buzz, buzz, buzz* of the emergency broadcast system when it isn't an emergency.

Too soon?  Nah...
1: Commercials and sound effects need to regulate their volume. I should have a switch that muffles sounds on the tv. I'm about to crash, but the show I have on has a sudden gun fight, and its so loud I jump. But if I turn the volume lower, it becomes impossible to hear regular conversation.  And to the commercial pitch men: yelling at me and waking me up makes me boycott whatever crap you're selling.

I'm in bed as a write, and now it's time to find a good (but not great) show, roll over, and dream.  Good night!  (And please leave a comment below, and like us on Facebook.)

5 comments:

  1. Testing the emergency broadcast system over night is an abuse of the system. If ever a real emergency occurred in the middle of the night, I'd assume it was a test and simply turn my television off and most likely die, but not before several minutes of tossing and turning as I tried to fall back asleep after being rudely awakened.

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  2. Heh heh... Benson.

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  3. This was before your Star Trek comment, btw...

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  4. Yeah, it's ridiculous.  The first time it happened I jumped out of bed thinking there was an emergency.  Now it just makes me really angry...  Complete abuse...

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  5. I know, which makes it even funnier. Or weirder. Probably both.

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