Friday, July 6, 2012

Top 5 Creepy Songs About Stalkers

Stalking, somehow, is a fairly common theme in songs.  Different singers take different approaches, but in the end it all amounts to delusional fantasies and peering through windows with binoculars (or worse).  Here are the top 5 songs about stalking, all from the stalker's point of view, along with a few lyrics from each that really send the creepy message home.

5: Hello (Lionel Richie) - "I've been alone with you inside my mind. And in my dreams I've kissed your lips a thousand times. I sometimes see you pass outside my door--hello, is it me you're lookin' for? ... 'Cause I wonder where you are and I wonder what you do--are you somewhere feeling lonely, or is someone loving you?" Borderline--he's sweating some bird at work, and has fantasies about her. You can see how he's starting to cross over into delusion though--"is it me you're lookin' for?" No.

4: Every Breath You Take (Sting & The Police) - "Every single day and every word you say; every game you play, every night you stay, I'll be watching you. Oh can't you see? You belong to me. How my poor heart aches with every breath you take." Sweet love song? Nope--creepy stalker. Note the language: "You belong to me."

3: Turning Japanese (The Vapors) - "I've got a picture of me and you. You wrote, 'I love you,' I wrote, 'me too.' I sit there staring and there's nothing else to do. ... I've got your picture, I've got your picture--I'd like a million of you all to myself. I want a doctor to take your picture so I can look at you from inside as well." Autograph to a fan, perhaps, who sits there "thinking" about the celeb and kissing the autographed picture. Anything creepier than that last quoted line?

2: Straw Hat and Old Dirty Hank (Barenaked Ladies) - "You signed your picture with an O and X; I'll bet you don't write 'love' each time you write your checks. ... You say you love me; is that the truth? Although they've heard the songs my friends want living proof. I know your address, I ring the bell. I bring you flowers and a .22 with shells." A relatively unknown song compared to the rest of the list, but again about a fan who thinks the artist's songs speak directly to him. He kills the artist. Ah, love.

1: Possession (Sarah McLachlan) - "Oh you speak to me in riddles and you speak to me in rhymes. My body aches to breathe your breath, your words keep me alive. And I will be the one to hold you down, kiss you so hard. I'll take your breath away and after, I'd wipe away the tears. Just close your eyes, dear." This is number one because it's about an actual person who stalked McLachlan, was arrested, and ultimately killed himself.The words are simply haunting. Yeah, cheery, right?

So, now that I've brought you down to start the day, how about checking out some of the other Kooz Top 5 lists and having a laugh! Also, check us out on Facebook where we post and repost funny things we come across, and while you're there, press that pesky "like" button! Of course, you can always let us know what you think in the comments below.


  1. What about invisible by clay aikan

  2. Ooh, I don't know that one...  I'll check it out!  

  3. I'm going to add Stan (i think?) by Eminen. So disturbing. And maybe Don't Stand So Close to Me by The Police?

  4. Yes, "Stan" is disturbing. Though I think it introduced most of the world to Dido. To what effect, I'm still not sure.