Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Top 5 Depressing Things About the Female Gender

A woman I know recently told me how depressed her gender makes her feel.  She said it seemed like all the stereotypes are true.  Here are the five things that most depress her about her gender. [Not the opinions of Kooz!]

5: Scientists - Name one other than Marie Curie.  I know one female paleontologist and one research pharmacist, but that's it--and I am a science nerd!  Females are wildly and woefully under-represented in the sciences.

4: Female Stand-Up Comics - With a handful of exceptions, they are awful.

3: Women Watching Female Stand-Ups - They are laughing hysterically. Why?

2: Athletes - The best female basketball players are not in the NBA.  Nor are the best female baseball players in MLB, football players in the NFL, or hockey players in the NHL.  Sorry, men and women are different, and while women can become some amazing athletes,the haven't been able to break in with the big American sports.  (And if you think there's some bias by the teams, imagine the revenue from jersey sales alone for the team who hires the first woman player in a major sport.)

1: Drivers - Are women better or worse than men?  Men are more aggressive and prefer larger cars, which makes them feel invincible and take even more chances.  But it is women's caution, says men, that cause them to be bad drivers--driving is based on anticipation of the actions of others, and women are so cautious as to be unpredictable.  Or so I've heard.

I told my friend that she should write this, but she was afraid other women would rise up against her--poorly, she added.  Anyway, don't kill the messenger!  But do follow us on Facebook or leave us a comment below!


  1. So says Tina Fey: " I know older men in comedy who
    can barely feed and clean themselves, and they still work. The women,
    though, they’re all ‘crazy.’ I have a suspicion — and hear me out,
    because this is a rough one — that the definition of ‘crazy’ in show
    business is a woman who keeps talking even after no one wants to f*ck
    her anymore."

  2. Tina Fey is amazing, isn't she? And let's be clear, there are hilarious women in comedy, and there are men who are complete hacks. And I don't know enough about it to confirm this, but I suspect there's a bias against women which is why we don't see women comedians as often as we see men. That's also probably due to there being fewer women going out for comedy careers.

    That said, the genesis of this post was from a woman who was watching a bad woman comic who told bad joke after bad joke and was cracking up ONLY the women in the audience. She (the brains behind this post) jokingly said she was embarrassed for her sex.

    Anyway, it's a funny line, and this is a humor blog.

  3. The most depressing, by far however, is the fact that as a female, I am not able to pee while standing. :(

  4. Check this out--with this, you too can write your name in the snow!

  5. Just a quick note, there has been at least 1 woman drafted to the NBA. In 1977 Lusia Harris was drafted by the New Orleans Jazz, 137th overall pick. She ended up being pregnant when training camp started, so that's where her career ended.

  6. Interesting, I hadn't heard that. I'd heard of a woman who was given a tryout, but couldn't keep up with the pace. I wonder what would have happened had Harris made it...

  7. One of the great mysteries of the past. It would have been amazing if she had actually played, even if she rode the bench if would have been huge...especially in the 70s....

  8. I think the "lack" of funny Female Stand-Up Comedians is at least partially due to viewer perception. Too much of the audience has been told over time that women aren't funny, so that's the subconscious prism through which they watch the performance. Not that they're aren't bad female comedians, of course. I just think they all start out with this bias against them before they even open their mouths.

  9. I think a big part of it is also that fewer women went into comedy as a career (that seems to be changing, at least form what I see). In the 80s when I was watching Evening at the Improv, there were almost no women. The few who got big at that time were all schtick (Judy Tenuda (sp?), for example) with limited exceptions (like Barr).